#1. On my list was write a book and so I have. I once wanted to write a book that would effect many people throughout the world! (Big dreams!) Instead I wrote something very personal and will probably rarely share it.
#29. I was supposed to show everyone a huge project I have been working on. Over time it has morphed in several ways. I originally wanted to build a house a little ways away from the noise of the world. I wanted to live there but have a large house and property where other people could come. There they could take deep breaths, think, and recover from whatever was going on in their lives. I wanted to have a get-a-way for people who are depressed or struggling so they could get back on their feet and have a better chance of empowering themselves and being happy. That's the short idea of it.
Another project had to do with making quilts! I have been given and I've collected many fabric scraps over time and I am constantly piecing them together into quilt tops. I wanted to get to a certain number of quilt tops, and then launch a kickstarter campaign to raise money for the materials to finish the quilts. Once they were finished they would then be given away. I love piecing quilt tops. I love giving quilts. I have been told to sell them and I am more than happy to make them and sell them on request but the true joy for me comes from piecing together scraps that have no other place, giving them a purpose and letting them comfort and warm others.
These projects still live inside of me and will come to fruition, but not at this time.
I have felt more of an urgency to be me and to make sure my priorities are in order. Who am I? I am Jessica. I will be 30 this year. I have a husband and children that I love and adore. I have sought for more love and attention than what they give, but what they give is real and perfect. I am tired of the illusion of real life and relationships on the internet (don't get me wrong there are pros about the internet!) but I am going to strive more to live in reality. I am not one who loves doing this blog so this will be my last post. I am a seeker of a more spiritual life and I have been for a long time. It is only now that I am strong enough to let go of the world and move on. I am a “mother who knows” and that's my priority.
#30. I was wanting to throw a big party with lots of people. Sounds fun right?!
It's really not me to have a huge birthday bash. I've just always done things to please people or do things because I worry and care deeply about what people think of me. I have wanted people to need me to be a part of their lives, but they just don't. Truthfully I would love to have a close friend or two to get together where we can have real conversations and laugh and cry, etc.
Here we go. . . Sorry if this doesn't make much sense to you reader, but I am off. May your life be spectacular and may your dreams come true. May you laugh much and love more. May you walk barefoot in the grass or the sand and cloud watch on a summer day. May you find happiness because that's exactly what I am going for.
Oh and in case I don't see you again.... Good Afternoon. Good Evening. And Good Night. :)